Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Why I Love Australian Women

I read something fantastic today. According to ABC News: A study has found one third of Australian women have admitted to drinking alcohol when pregnant - and most would do it again.

Australia women are now some of my favorite people in the world.

Why you ask? Because they don't give a darn about what they eat and drink when they are pregnant.

This is all part of a long line of thinking so don't be mad if your lost, let me explain.

First off, don't get me wrong. I think modern medicine is pretty fantastic. People are living longer and people are overcoming diseases that they couldn't before. Polio - Cured, Small Pox - Cured, Bubonic Plague - Contained? Doesn't matter. Western Medicine has come a long way. However, while we have rid the world of some horrible diseases, there has been an extreme rise in Hypochondriasis.

For those of you who don't know what that is, A Hypochondriac is someone who interprets normal body sensations as a major medical problem. Example: If one day you have an itch on your nose and it causes you to think that you have Bird Flu, then your a Hypochondriac.


The reason for the rise in Hypochondriasis is two-fold:
1) Doctors
2) Oprah

Number # 1:Doctors
Thats right. These doctors that are curing diseases are now making people afraid of everything. They know we will listen. They know we will do anything they say. They know if we come in with a cough and they tell us to snort tuna through a crazy straw two times each night,we will do it. No matter how absurd we think it is, we will do it. Don't say you won't. You will, deal with it.
Since they know we will do everything they say, they screw with us. They tell us not to eat this, don't eat that, that will kill you, this vegetable will ruin your marriage, ETC... That's the bottom line, they know we will hang on every word they say, so they talk alot. Since they constantly come out with things for us to be afraid of, we cannot eat anything without thinking of something a "doctor" said. Therefore we live in fear and seemingly normal foods make us feel like we are going to die right after we eat them. Doctor's have made us hypochondriacs. Doctor's are evil.

Number # 2: Oprah
I have defended this lady in the past, but not now...not ever again. Oprah brings these so called "doctors" on each day and these "doctors" are allowed to deliver their words of fear on national television EVERY DAY! On top of that, I have seen many times Oprah telling the American public not to eat this, or not do this because she heard from a doctor that it is bad for you. While this type of stuff is all over television,Millions and millions of people watch Oprah each day. This lady controls the hearts and minds of all women over 30 living in America. Since these women are primarily the ones shopping and serving the food in the household, everyone in the family suffers.

(Don't get mad because I said women are the ones serving the food, Yes I know women are equal to men and it isn't fair that women get stuck with stereotypes that they belong in the kitchen. But, it doesn't mean we cannot be honest and say that women primarily handle the food. If you disagree, get a blog. Chances are you already have one)

With the doctor's creating the fear and Oprah's television program spreading the fear to nearly every household in America, there has been a steady rise in Hypochondriasis.

Now that we have that established, it allows me to bring it back to my original point: Pregnant women from Australia are my new favorite kinds of people because they drink beer when they are pregnant and don't feel ashamed. They chose to ignore one of the thirteen million books written about the "right way" to handle your pregnancy. They don't let some doctor infect them with fear about what they can or cannot eat and they certainly don't give a damn about Oprah.

They do what they feel is right because that is how humanity has always gotten along. The cavemen did it and everybody who came after did it and they did it without doctors or Oprah.

Now I know a lot of you are saying, "Reid, that is horrible that they drink beer when they are pregnant! They are silly people and their children are probably going to turn out crazy."

Maybe so.... but compare Australia's crime rate and educational scores with the United States and then tell me how silly they are.

Our country may be a superpower, but were superstupid.

Don't let doctors tell you what to fear. Just eat, drink, and be merry because this life is but a vapor.

Post Script: I don't mean be a drunk or eat until your a beast. I just meant to enjoy yourself in moderation and don't let people dictate how you live your live.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not very much. I did say in the Post Script that I didn't mean drink excessively. I am refering to the women that drink in moderation. It wasn't an article about the "Drunk Whores of Australia." It was about the women whom enjoyed a beer once and a while.

Alcohol and Crime rates weren't the main focus of the story, so it wouldn't do much to my argument. It was a spice, an added touch. The meat is where the nutrition is. Even if you did just take away one of my spices, there is still good food on the plate.

Even I am getting really lost in the meat/spice analogy.

Anonymous said...

I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. That Ross Perot analogy is completely lost on me.

At one point in your blog, you said:

Now I know a lot of you are saying, "Reid, that is horrible that they drink beer when they are pregnant! They are silly people and their children are probably going to turn out crazy."

Maybe so.... but compare Australia's crime rate and educational scores with the United States and then tell me how silly they are.


So it appeared to me that you were using Australia's crime rates and educational scores as justification for it not being that big of a deal that women drink while being pregnant.

The article I presented to you stated that there was a direct correlation between crime rates dropping and alcohol bands. You argued that because of Australia's low crime rates and high test scores, clearly they're doing something right, and thus it's ok for women to drink while being pregnant. The article suggests that crime rates are dropping because of restrictions against alcohol consumption.

I thought it made for an interesting contrast to your argument.